“Today, I walked into my family room to see my mom watching the video of her marriage to my stepdad, because she wanted to transfer the VCR to a DVD. I got there right in time to watch myself walk down the aisle as the flower girl. Half way down, I dumped out the remaining flower petals in the basket and put the basket on my head. I proceeded to skip the rest of the way down the aisle. Way to go, little me. MLIA”

Dear Kids These Days,

I know most of you weren’t very aware of the contemporary technology in your youth, as made evident in the above My Life Is Average submission. And, no, I can’t blame only you; this is a very frequent occurence. Well, it has to change. When I was a kid, eight-tracks were obsolete — yet I knew what they were and what to call them. If you can make the effort, please learn that VCRs are what play tapes. These tapes are referred to as VHS (Video Home System). So, you would say, “…because she wanted to transfer the VHS to a DVD.” Please and thank you.

Sincerely yours,
Alexi