Do you still paint/draw/create? Haven’t seen anything from you in a while.

I know! I haven’t done any leisurely stuff since April 2009, and that’s sort of ridiculous. My pal, Allyson, and I were just discussing how we don’t do anything anymore. The only things I’ve done lately were props and costumes for the children’s theatre company I help out, and that doesn’t really count. I was looking at items in my family’s storage unit last week, and I found a bunch of paintings I made in high school and grade school. It doesn’t matter that they’re terrible…it was cathartic and relaxing to sit in my bedroom and make them. I do have a few items on the art agenda currently. I will have to put aside some time to actually do it. You’ll be the first to know when these things are completed.

How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck would?

I’d imagine it would rely heavily on the characteristics of the woodchuck, the wood, and the time period in question.

Ariel or Jasmine?

Let’s see. Ariel changed herself drastically — at great risk — to be with a man she barely knew, with whom she had never spoken while conscious. However, she’s a MERMAID. Then there’s Jasmine. She was true to herself (though she feigned common status every now and then for kicks). You know, I really hate when you do this to me. Hmmm. I have close ties with both films, and I did have both Ariel AND Jasmine Barbie dolls when I was wee…but for the time being, my love for Aladdin is greater. So, Jasmine is the winner because she’s “one jump ahead of the slowpokes, one skip ahead of my doom (next time gonna use a nom de plume). One jump ahead of the hitmen, one hit ahead of the flock…I think I’ll take a stroll around the block.”

Also, holy crap. I quote this sand-tiger from the Cave of Wonders, in his scraggly voice, entirely too much for a twenty-three year old woman:

Oh! I also laugh every time I hear the part in “A Whole New World” where Aladdin is like, “DON’T YOU DARE SHUT YOUR EYES!” Abusive relationship on the horizon, right? 



Ask me a thing or a thang, if you feel so inclined.

GPOYW:KKE
Gratuitous Picture of Yourself Wednesday: Kunta Kinte Edition

The title is apt, you see, because I have roots. So, kiss them goodbye; I have a date with some scissors and highlights. I have to look good for my pilgrimage to Jeff, you know.

Please try to remember to throw yourself a 40th birthday party in 2026 and have it UB40 themed. You can listen to “Red, Red Wine” all night and watch people try to figure out the genius behind it all.

Note to dummies: It’s genius because it’s UB40, and I’ll be 40.

How many times have you fallen in love?

Being the eternal optimist when it comes to romance, I used to think I was always in love. Looking realistically at my past and present, I feel confident saying I’ve fallen in love twice. Once, it ended badly. The second time, well, I’m loving every minute of it. :)

the perfect plain, nude shoes are at target. i literally pulled out my phone to call you and tell you, then realized i don’t have your number.

HOLY CRAP. I’m on it like a bonnet.

Where does this long distance love live?

This boy lives a little north of Chicago. Oh, yes, this means he coexists with frigid temperatures that result in unthinkable activities like frickin’ ice fishing. If this question is being asked because of a previous question regarding whether or not I’d move to be with him, then let me tell you this. Chicago has a good support system for me there; friends and family alike live in the city or in the ‘burbs surrounding. However, the boy and I have discussed the possibility of (if things should get truly serious) choosing a neutral city. This way, one didn’t move for the other…we moved to be with each other. But, we’ll see. I think I’m getting a bit ahead of myself…but that’s what I do, I suppose.


Ask your own questions here. Inappropriate inquiries welcome, too!

Mom attempts a joke utilizing Jeff’s Jewish background.

Me: Do you think his mom will like me?
Mom: Yeah, she’ll like you…even though you’re a shitska.
Me: You mean shiksa?
Mom: No, I meant shitska.

• Pepperoncini
• Earlobes
• Beautiful Ls
• Aligned goals
• Faith
• Heritage
• Compulsions
• Openness
• Toyota
• Artsy fartsy
• Trust
• Postcards
• Coffee shops
• Attraction
• Pets
• Everything

And when I say everything, I certainly don’t mean nothing.

Kava and Savannah have new collars! I was being a complete Facebook creep and saw that my college roommate and long-distance BFF, Nikkie, recommended a great Etsy store to her sister, Shellie, that specializes in cutesy-wootsy dog collars. So, asking permission to steal their Etsy findings first, I swooped in and ordered these handmade felt florals:







(Thank heavens I’m going to get some highlights next week; these ashen roots are getting out of control.)

Which one of your friend’s boyfriend/husbands (current or past) have you found to be the most attractive?

I sincerely hope this is being asked by Matt or Sean (the husbands of my dear Ashley and Kendra, respectively). Alas, I doubt this is the case. I’ll try to be honest here, but I’m sort of at a loss. I tend to look at friends’ partners as off-the-market types. Hmmm…I do remember being envious of my friend, Grace, a LONG time ago. This was back when she was dating a boy named John, who was imported to Alabama from California. John was soon hired at the coffee shop where I worked, and the hots were dropped. Sure, he’s a hunk…but he’s like a brother to me, and that’s just weird. But yeah, for a moment, the mysterious California man with tattoos and mutton chops caused me to stare. Johnboy, please don’t barf on me if you read this.

Would you move to be with your new, long distance love?

We all know that I love my home in southern Alabama so much. It would be incredibly difficult to move away from my family, and I would be bummed to live in a less hot and humid climate. However, if my “new, long distance love” didn’t want to call this his home, too, then I guess Kava and I’d be packing our bags. I really can’t deny (as corny, harried, and ridiculous as this sounds to most sane people) that he is my perfect match as a person. If I’m lucky enough to have realized this in an old friend, maybe I’ll be lucky enough to keep him for good…and if that should happen, I’d go to the ends of the earth to be with him. How’s that for crazy?

Roseanne or Clone High?

Okay, you evil inquisitor…clearly, you know me well. And clearly, you want me to make the hardest decision of my life. Let me see if breaking it down will cause me to decide…

Clone High: Tragically short-lived. Unbelievably brilliant. Some historical knowledge necessary, which gives me an air of smarmy superiority (well, just being honest). Animated. Voices include Donald Faison.

Roseanne: Revolutionary. Clever as hell. JOHN GOODMAN. Oh, but there was that last season…terrible. Fun Halloween episodes. Gay rights support. Oh, but there was Tom Arnold…terrible. But, really, JOHN GOODMAN.

Oh, I don’t know. They’re too different to compare. I love them both so much; it’s like asking me to choose my favorite child.

Ask me a thang, if you feel so inclined.

So, this just happened. I was considering making cupcakes tomorrow, but then I remembered that I could just go buy a peanut butter pie from The Oyster House. So there I was, thinking, Pie or cake? Then, I suddenly realized I could actually have both. Immediately thereafter, I belted out, “You get the BEESSSSSST of both worlds!”

I’ve got to take a break from babysitting. And from the rest of my Miley-filled life.

Top five tumbleblogs?

In no particular order:
- buildingaladder.tumblr.com
- withoutmelissa.tumblr.com
- hipincognito.tumblr.com
- aliceintumblerland.tumblr.com
- itsallinmyhead.tumblr.com
- reallykatie.tumblr.com
- nogreatillusion.tumblr.com

Oh, was that seven? Oops. Well, really, I could go on and on. I think I love the above blogs so much because I feel close to all the ladies who write them. I can’t explain it. I also really like thisiswhyyourefat and blackandwtf, too. Oh, gosh. And I hate lists like this because I don’t want to offend. Basically, if I follow you, you’re tops to me; I’m sort of picky.


What is your favorite book and why? By the way, you don’t have to say the Bible. God won’t be offended.

I’m down with G-O-D (yeah, you know me) and all, but I wouldn’t have gone the Bible route for favorite books. Actually, I’m sort of wishy-washy. Of course, The Catcher in the Rye is on the list. That was the first or second novel I read all the way through in one sitting, I think (the other being Invisible Monsters by Chuck Palahniuk…not a favorite). But then, since I was little, I always really loved Ballet Shoes by Noel Streatfeild. But now, I got really touched by Love That Dog by Sharon Creech, which is a story told only in the poems a kid named Jack wrote in class. It follows his interest in poetry from dislike to passion. Plus, it highlights his relationship with his deceased pet. It’s really great, and it’s a quick read so you don’t have to go to sleep wondering what happens next. Also, I was completely pleased with the Harry Potter series. Meh. There you go, for now.


What your favorite article of clothing/ accessory? Why?

Easy! My vintage brown leather riding boots. I was in New Orleans three years ago (probably to the day), and I stopped dead in my tracks in front of the Urban Outfitters store. In the window, under some outfit I never even noticed, were some worn brown boots. I went in immediately and asked about them. The girl working there told me that they were from the 1980s and were sent to the store for display only. Of course, I offered to buy them. She was like, “They’re really small, but if they fit, we can give them to you for $78.” I squished my size six foot in them; they’re probably five-and-a-halfs. I had them ring me up. Now, I have had the flat, wooden heels redone twice and the leather retreated three times. I will nurse these babies to health for as long as I can; they look cute with everything, and I always wanted vintage riding boots.


What is your favorite insult (word, phrase, sentence)? by hipincognito

You know, I don’t know if I’d call it my favorite, but the one I use in retort most frequently is “your butt.”

“You look like crap today.”
“Your butt.”

I mean, does that even make sense? Nope. However, it’s been engrained in me since second grade…so it has been grandfathered in as my best cut-down.



Ask me something ridiculous and anonymous.